A Lesson in Anatomy

I have noticed many friends having trouble with their health. I've also been exploring, yet again, the possibilities that losing a job has presented in my life. I think I'm being called as a physician of the Universe; was it Socrates who said "physician heal thyself"? I think I've been steered to ways to do that, heal myself. The evidence speaks to me through the documentaries I've recently watched and the friends I've recently seen in pain. I've been successful with everything except smoking (despite my recent increased distaste for, and discomfort with it)...why is that.

Kidney location and pain

A very young, good friend recently started Chantix to quit smoking. What a fabulous drug! Effective for my friend, a pack a day smoker, in the first week. Too bad she had an allergic reaction that almost killed her. Chantix resulted in a heart attack and severe kidney infection. Ironic that taking the thing that will stop you from killing yourself slowly, can actually kill you quickly. 3 out of 4 people I know who have tried Chantix had an experience that made it not worth taking; experience worth dying slowly for.

Left Brain Stroke

Another person I care about very much, only 7 years older than me, had a stroke yesterday. She's very scared and I'm scared for her, but I know she will be okay. Her right side brain functions were effected; paralysis in the right arm and leg and partial in the motor speech skills. She's very active, and self motivated, and this will serve her well in her difficult and lengthy recovery. I've invited her to stay with me because she should not be alone and her place has too many stairs. Maybe she'll motivate me. I know she'll break records in her recovery. She's not a smoker, no bigger a drinker than I, not overweight, walks every morning, rain or shine. It can happen to anyone; is there a point to trying to be healthy?

Osteoporosis doesn't happen "naturally"

Notice the woman is gray haired? Do you think it only happens when you get old? If you are a woman? Do you think it happens no matter what? If you say "yes" to any of those questions, you are wrong. How does a 24 year old girl have osteoporosis?! Depoprevara for more than one year; that is all it took. She hasn't had children yet; how the HELL is she going to bear children eventually?! Just because a woman can only rely on herself to control her body, and her future, by delaying pregnancy until she's ready, is it worth taking birth control, is it worth being with a man who doesn't even consider this possibility? It tears me up in so many ways that this beautiful young woman must deal with an "old" woman's disease. Boys, grow up, take responsibility for your own sexual commitments, and wear condoms or get a vasectomy (they ARE reversible); better yet, don't have intercourse until you are ready to have a baby. Stop making women carry the weight of the world on our shoulders... it is quite literally breaking our backs.

Can you guess what this is?
Loneliness. But it looks like depression. Notice the posture, especially how the knees are drawn close to the chest. If you google images for "loneliness", the posture is overwhelmingly the same. Loneliness... all of my friends suffer more from that word than anything else. It is more damaging than their kidney infections, osteoporosis, and even more damaging than their strokes. The interesting thing I observe about the "posture" of loneliness is that it guards the chest, the heart, and all the chakras are wrapped up, like an egg. A protective shell on the outside, yet still fragile and crackable; the skin as the albumen, the protein, the builder of muscle; the deepest interior and most vital organ, the muscle we call the heart. The manner in which we protect our heart, is the same manner that gives us loneliness...we block. We block our heart with our knees bent a barrier to our our chest, our heart, and with our heels pulled into our sexual organs, another block, I think to our soul. Yet we expose our skin, a contradiction and invitation at the same time. We invite people to break the skin, but refuse to lower our protective hard bones, heels and knees. We hope that a brave soul will negotiate their way to our heart, with careful and kind manipulation, despite our guarded self protection. Ironic, this same description is applicable to conception. Loneliness is the biggest killer, yet the easiest to cure. Open up!

My loneliness looks like this. Facing the sun, rising or setting, walking toward the strength and longevity of the centuries old oak, in the distance that is only half as far as I've been and half way to where I'm going. A strong point of light, just at the tips of my fingers. Am I catching the light? Am I emitting the light? Both! There are days that I am human, and then days where I'm strong enough to practice being supra human. I feel strangely calm...somewhat melancholy. Namaste my loves, my friends, my childrens' hope.