Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Saturday, July 18, 2015

How to Find Love, and Keep it


 
Tears started flowing in the first 30 seconds of this video. Tears I COULD. NOT. STOP. It was as if someone else was crying. It WAS someone else crying. It was the true me; the one I hide from.

At first I was like, what’s up with these tears?! Then I was like, I want a man like that.

photo of insecurity imperfection love loyalty safety overweight acceptance music video monarae-beads
Flickr.com AndYaDontStop
 


When I shared this on Facebook I said, “If you can’t feel like this, if you can’t SAY this, then it isn’t love.”
 
 
I then realized, this little voice inside me was saying, if you can’t feel this way about yourself, if you NEED to hear this, then you can’t handle this kind of love.




photo of insecurity imperfection love loyalty safety overweight acceptance beauty society monarae-beads
Flickr.com Classic Film


I know I need to love myself. I think I do love myself. I’m proud of myself. I love my body, well most of it. But there is this perfection that I seek, that I cannot find, that keeps me from seeing what is truly there.
 
There is a part of me that has been taught that if I am fat, if I am ugly, if I am less than (fill in the blank), then I will not be loved; worse, I will lose whatever it is I think love is.

What touches me deeply in this video, is when he says, “I’m not going anywhere.” That is all I want; safety, loyalty, forever.


photo of insecurity imperfection love loyalty safety overweight acceptance beauty society monarae-beads
We Heart It.com

Lovers of women who are reading this, yes we need to love ourselves, but we need to be TOLD we are worthy of that love. We need to hear a voice that is LOUDER than our inner demons/ego. We need to hear it often, especially when we don’t believe it is true. Sure, we should love ourselves, but we are women, and we are taught not to trust in a society that historically, perhaps as far back as the first encoding of our DNA, that what we think is not important; only what they think about what they SEE is important. And actually, all the same is truly said to lovers of men.

 
Woman or man, you need to speak the truth about your love. Don’t take it for granted.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

WeDesire WeDnesday: Desire Map

In December, 2012, I began reading The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte. I first noticed Danielle in 2009 when she was writing a blog called White Hot Truth. That title perfectly describes the authenticity with which Danielle speaks. From there she introduced Your Big Beautiful Book Plan, then The Fire Starter Sessions, and now she has gifted the world (sounds mushy I know but the love I feel for her work warrants mushiness!) with The Desire Map.


The Desire Map is a holistic approach to planning your life. It guides you to identify your core desired feelings, and to use those feelings as the drivers of what you want to do, have and experience in your life.
It turns goal-setting inside out.
The Desire Map is a multimedia program. It comes with a PRINTED book (it’s embossed, even!) a downloadable book, audio book, a series of audio contemplations; a private, online Desire Map space; an app, and 12 weeks of weekly inspiration to help people make desire-mapping a true practice.


If you haven't already read my posts about the Desire Map, let me share with you that it is a new way of thinking for me; it is a way of making decisions and "goals with soul". The premise is that we are conditioned to make decisions and goals based on what we think we will feel when we achieve them. The Desire Map makes one aware that they can feel that way right now; it helps me realize that what I think I will feel later, I can feel now, if I make "how I want to feel now" a priority. Instead of waiting to feel whole and complete I can feel that way now and along the way to my goals, by doing the things that make me feel that way.

Here; I'll let Danielle tell you

Friday, May 24, is Danielle's birthday. Her gift to you is a "pay what you can" day for The Desire Map program. With the program you receive a paper copy of the book and access online to the digital download, music play lists, weekly support emails from Danielle, and some other nice goodies. There is even a support group on Facebook that you can check out right now; you don't have to own The Desire Map to join the group (it is a public group) so check it out here. You can also play this audio; it is a reading by Danielle of her introductory chapter of the book!


Don't worry that it's a gimmick (it's not.) Don't worry that you will be obligated to buy more (everything you need is in one package.) Don't worry that what you can pay is not enough (it is.) You know you found this post today for a reason; believe in it.

Wouldn't it feel good to feel good about everything you decide to do? Decide to accept Danielle's gift and get your blessing; pay what you can. CLICK HERE to get your blessing.




Wednesday, May 8, 2013

We Desire Wednesday: Distraction from Self


Gratitude Journal by ILoveItAll
Am I just bored? Sure I want more money, but I have what I need to pay back Peter when I borrow from Paul. I have a beautiful big house in a beautiful big forest on a beautiful big mountain. I have an amazing son who never asks me for more than I can give, and has the most amazing mind and the biggest heart. I have two adorable pooches, and even though one is lame and the other one likes to eat poop, they are still loving. I have talent, tons of talent. I am creative with everything I do, I can write, I can talk, I can think, I can put myself out into the world with (mostly) effortless courage. So why, with all of this, am I questioning what I am supposed to be doing with my life?

Am I really just bored when I think "I have no purpose. I have no direction.  I have no goals."? Well, I don't set goals the way I used to; my goals are to feel the way I want to feel. I feel faithful that the Universe has the plan, and I'm just waiting to see what that is and what I'm supposed to do with it. I know I'm a good advocate, and I'm applying for jobs that will let me shine and advocate for people. I've had a few interviews but no job.

Why we can't live in the moment by Futurity.com
When I think of the comforts I will have to give up so that I can work I feel like I'm losing something, and then I think of the comforts I will gain by having a job, and the joy and satisfaction I will gain, and there is a balance. So I keep going, but not knowing where. When I feel dissatisfied, or puzzled about the current state of my existence, am I really just bored? Am I looking for drama? Am I looking for something to stir me? Am I questioning it because I want to be distracted from being okay with myself and doing the things I love and have the luxury of time to do right now?

Sakura Bloom by Tesori Trovati
I once identified with the fulcrum on a teeter-totter. I'm feeling like that again. I'm sure that's not a coincidence. I have been feeling a need to look back, to learn from myself. I also feel the need to start fresh with The Desire Map. There's a quiet opportunity right now to grow. A seed was planted, and like those I planted in my garden, it is germinating and soon will be visible. Here's to spring, springing upward into life.

But before I go, I have to share this amazing song with you. I saw it for the first time just as I was finishted writing this post.

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Charming - Memories Blog Hop

When Lori Anderson announced the Memories and Thanks Blog Hop the timing could not have been more perfect; I had just finished making a necklace full of honor for important people in my life. I called this necklace Talisman, and it was inspired in large part by Erin Prais Hinz. I posted about this necklace and Erin's inspirational role back in November, but at that time I hadn't really and truly made it an acknowledgement of love and thanks.

Much has happened since creating this necklace (including completely redesigning it!), so I'll begin where I left off in November, and give official "thanks" in honor of the many loves in my life.

S'elf by SuziFitz Beads
My very good friend, Suzi Fitzwaters, was looking for volunteers to go to the Bay Area Bead Expo, and I happened to be free. Suzi and I live an hour's drive from each other but rarely get together. But, when we do, watch out! We always have such a great time, and she's so sassy! Suzi is a lampwork artist too, and is known for her "S'elf" beads. She likes to experiment with glass, and once found a very cool reaction and made a small set of beads just for me. Look for the large lentil and two matching roundels in the most gorgeous blue with coppery spots in my talisman necklace. If it weren't for Suzi, I would not be able to make beads the way I can now; she gifted me her old torch and gave me such a great deal on her oxygen concentrator it may as well have been free!

This is my son Isaac, my daughter Hillary, and my grand daughter Lydia (Z-girl). Isaac and Hillary are 13 years apart. Both my kids have grown to be such amazing people, and now we have little Z (Her name was almost Zadora, which I loved). I'm proud of both of them and it will be such a pleasure to watch them continue to do amazing things in the world. On my necklace is a charm I had made for my son when our beloved pug, Max, died. The picture was taken in Portland and is one of my favorites.

This is a U.S. Army Combat Infantry Badge 1st Award. It belonged to my father; he served 3 tours in Viet Nam during his Army career. My father died when he was 50. I never realized how very young that is, until now as I approach 50. I miss him very much and I'm sure he visited my Isaac when he was a baby. I feel his presence still. He's the third from the left in this picture of him with his siblings.

These are the beads I won from Erin. I had expressed this prize as my favorite because of the large focal, and it's Indian feel. My favorite bead I've ever made, because of how it felt to make it, is the Buddha in this necklace; it has been waiting for Erin's focal. You will find all of these beads in the necklace, along with my birthstone (raw Amethyst), a quartz point and a chunk of raw quartz with chlorite (bittersweet memories); these beads pay tribute to me, and all that I am. Here is the woman to whom "all that I am" is attributable to, my dear mother, Uta.

Please visit the other "blog hoppers" sharing their memories and tributes; the list at the bottom is clickable or you can click here.

And now, I present with heartfelt and never-ending gratitude, "Talisman"
Talisman by MonaRAEbeads

 Hostess, Lori Anderson       Pretty Things
Impetus for this Blog Hop, Elena Adams' mom    Momma's Little Birdies
 Adlinah Kamsir                   Dream Struck Designs

 Aimee Biondolillo               Aimee's Jewelry Treasures

 Alicia Marinache                 All the Pretty Things
 Andra Marasteanu               Handmade by Indra Marasteanu
 Andrea Trank                      Heaven Lane Creations
 April Grinaway                   Brooklyn Bead Goddess

Barb Solem                         Vivi Magoo Presents

Becky Pancake                    Becky Pancake Bead Designs

Beth Emery                         Stories by Indigo Heart

Bonnie Coursolle                Jasper's Gems

Cassi Paslick                       Beads: Rolling Downhill

Catherine King                    Catherine's Musings

Cece Cormier                      The Beading Yogini

Chandra Leitz                     Juniper Goods

Charissa Nesler                   FireStorm Designs
Charlie Jacka                       Clay Space

Christina Hickman              Vintage Treasures Jewelry

Christine Murrow               Charis Designs Jewelry
Christine Stonefield            Sweet Girl Design

Chrizette Bayman               Bead Soup Mix

Cindy Wilson                      It's My Sea of Dreams

CJ Bauschka                       4 His Glory Creations by CJ

Crystal Thain                      Here Bead Dragons

Cyndi Lavin                        Beading Arts

Debbie Rasmussen             A little of this, a little of that

Denielle Hagerman             Some Beads... and other things I like
Diana Gonzalez                  Arte y Poemas

Diane Hawkey                    diane hawkey

Dita Basu                            ankarshilpa

Donetta Farrington             Simply Gorgeous

Dyanne Everett-Cantrell     Deeliteful Jewelry Creations

Emma Todd                        A Polymer Penchant

Erin Kenny                         beadiful therapy

Erin Prais-Hintz                  Treasures Found

Gina Hockett                      Freestyle Elements

Gloria Allen                        Innovative Dreams Jewelry

Heather Marston                 CSW Designs

Inge von Roos                    Inge's Blog

Iveth Caruso                       Creative Atelier

Jacqueline Marchant          Fiddledeedee Jewelry

Jami Shipp                         Celebrating Life!

Jean Yates                          Snap Out of it Jean, There's Beading to Do!

Jennifer Reno                     Musings of a Crafty Jenny
 Jenny Robledo                   Peppa's Dream

Jennifer VanBenschoten    Jewelry, Art and Life
Jessica Klaaren                  Cellar Door Jewelry

Jessica Murray                   Whimsical Monkey

Joan Williams                     lilruby jewelry

Jo-Ann Woolverton            It's a Beadiful Creation

Joanne Browne                   josjewels1

Jodie Marshall                    Jodie Marshall Lampwork Beads Wearable Art

Johanna Rhodes                 Fire Phoenix Creations
 John Rasmussen                 Rasumussen Gems and Jewelry LLC

JuLee Wolfe                       The Polymer Penguin

Julie Bean                           Blue Pig Blog

Karen Mitchell                   Over the Moon Designs

Karin King                         The Sparklie Things Blog
 Karin Slaton                       Backstory Beads

Kat Douglas                       Washoe Kat's
 Kay Bolton                        Toodles and Binks

Kelly Hosford Patterson     The Traveling SideShow

Kim Ballor                          Vitamin C ... A Daily Does of Creativity

Kim Dworak                       CianciBlue

Kim Houston                       The Pink Martini
 Kym Hunter                         Kym Hunter Designs

Laren Dee Barton                Laren Dee Designs

Lea Avroch                          LA Jewelry Designs

Leanne Loftus                      First Impression Design

Liddy McLaughlin               Liddy McLaughlin Art

Linda Florian                       Lily's of the Valley Jewelry & Creative Creations

Linda Inhelder                     Must-Haves Jewelry

Lisa Hamilton                      Simply Irresistable Jewelry
Lisa Suver                            Fancee That

Lori Bowring Michaud        Artfully Ornamental

Lori Poppe                           Adventures in Creativity with Lorillijean

LouAnn Elwell                    Southpass Beads

Mandi Effron                       Craft-o-licious

Marcia DeCoster                 MadDesigns

Marcia Dunne                     The Alternative Foundry

Marie Covert                      Creating Interest

Marjorie Savill Linthwaite     bennubirdrising

Marlene Cupo                        Amazing Designs by Marlene

Martha Aleo                           Ornamento

Marti Conrad                          Marti's Buttons -n- Beads

Mary Ellen Parker                  BeeTree by m.e.

Mary Govaars                        MLH Jewelry Designs

Mary Lindell                          Mary Lindell Artisan Jewelry

Maureen Connolly                 Mrs Beadsley's Workshop

Maybeline Tay                       The Jewelry Larder

Melissa Elgin                         The Addicted Beader

Melissa Mesara                      one-eared pig beads

Menka Gupta                         Menka's Jewelry

Michaela Pabeschitz              la mar de bonita

Mischelle Fanucchi               Micheladas Musings

Mona Rae Baroody               Who Does She Bead She Is?

Nan Emmett                          Spirit Rattles -- Spirited Earth

Nancy Pedersen                    Something Heartfelt by Nancy

Natalie Davidson                  NorthShore Days
Nikki Douglas                      Bead It and Weep

Pam Farren                           re-maker

Pam, the Crazier Sister        The Crazy Creative Corner

Pam Traub                            Klassy Joolz
Priya Krish                           Hellopalz 
Rebecca Anderson               Song Beads

Rebecca Sirevaag                 Becca's Place

Robin Kae Reed                   Artistry HCBD

Rochelle Brisson                  a creative chelle

Rosa Maria Cuevas              Helena de Troya

Sabine Dittrich                     perlendschungel

Sandi Volpe                          Sandi Volpe

Sandra McGriff                    Creative Chaos

Sarah Goode                         Pookledo
Sarah Singer                         String a Song of Sixpence

Serena Trent                         All Things Made Jewelry

Shai Williams                       Shaiha's Ramblings
Sharon Palac                        Sharon's Jewelry Garden

Sharyl McMillian-Nelson    Sharyl's Jewelry & Reflections

Sheila Davis                         Stone Designs

Shelley Graham Turner        Fabric of My Life

Sherri Stokey                       Knot Just Macrame

Sherry Baun                         Unicorns Jewels

Skylar Bre'z                         Brising Beads

Stephanie Haussler              Pixybug Designs

Tania Spivey                        Moobie Grace Designs

Terri G.                                Blooming Ideas

Terry Carter                         Tapping Flamingo

Terry Matuszyk                    Pink Chapeau Vintage Jewelry

Toltec Jewels                       Jewel School Friends
Tracy Kruse                         Goldkisses Art

Tracy Martin                        Nutkitten's Jewelry

Zia Parks                              Anzi~Panzi's Work Shoppe

Zoe Marcin                          Beads, Tea and Sweets