In Organic We Trust

I just watched this documentary, In Organic We Trust; I'm all about making informed (from both sides of an issue) decisions. Based on the title and description, I expected the film to be the con side of the food issue; I know that "organic" does not mean "certified organic", just like "whole wheat" does not mean "100% whole wheat."

This film is inspiring! It was a well balanced documentary that touched on all my buttons, was incredibly informative and educational, and the whole point was about making informed decisions about food by being connected to how it grows, how it is industrialized, and how you can have the best food. Healthy should not be, and does not have to be, only for the wealthy!

This spring/summer is my third gardening year. Every year I learn something new. Gardening has all the emotional benefits of raising a child. My plants are my babies, and they will grow up to change the world. This movie inspires me to share, learn, and teach about my "children"; I think I'll start a new blog. Stay tuned for MonaRAEgrows (or something like that!)

Being of Service to Judgement

Being of service to judgment is a healing thing, but what does that mean?

I am going to play pool soon, but had to get this out, so just words with this post and no pretty pictures. Maybe you can send me (or post to my Facebook Profile or Page) the images this post brings to your mind.

I had a conversation yesterday with a friend who goes to church EVERY Sunday. We like to joke with each other. I asked him, "Are you going to church tomorrow? Who are you going to pray for?" He responded, "You!" I said, "Ask God to give me presence: for the gifts that have been given, and ease: not to struggle with worry and fear." I think he said his prayers early!

Here it is Sunday morning, before church (I never go.) I am thinking about my waking dream and realizing its meaning. I dreamed that I was arguing with my ex and angry and abandoned to be left alone to deal with the responsibility that is ours. I find myself in a new living situation; a communal type. We are having group discussions after a demonstration of some with musical talent. Along the time I've been there, I've often heard one ask another, "Are you feeling stressed?"; it was even asked of me, and I felt it was a strange question. After the music demonstration, a man came forward with a suggestion for a better sound and demonstrated it to the musician; my response was agreement that it did sound better to me. The musician did not respond in any particular way, however another responded in defense of a perceived insult, and returned with a statement that the one who was being helpful was not qualified to do so. And the "defensiveness" trickled outward, and coalesced into a river of criticism. The original suggester left the room. I spoke out, as an unexpected fork in the stream; a river with the unseen (even to myself) potential to be strong enough to cut more deeply into the substrate than expected.

I said, "I can understand why he left. He is being perceived as judgmental, this makes you uncomfortable, your response is to be defensive. You defend "another" without seeing that the other is not offended, that no one is offended, but rather without looking at your own feelings. You pretend you are helping, without acknowledging the helpful attentions of another because your own voice of discomfort is begging for a response. You are judging him because his helpfulness makes you uncomfortable, NOT because you feel the musician needs defending." And then I took this statement and began reflecting it onto my own action of defending another. I did not intend to come to a defense, but it is what I did. I spoke in the cloak of "protection" and the undergarments of "teaching."

My waking thoughts were, "What am I feeling, really?" Perhaps when I judge myself, or others, I am not acknowledging what I'm really feeling. Am I reacting to a discomfort? When I judge myself it often begins with "should"...I should have been (pick one: smarter, wiser, less trusting, more trusting, better, kinder, generous and the list goes on. I react to this discomfort with words and deeds that deflect from my own self worth...my reaction PUSHES me from being present to what is and letting it be.

My dream is the answer to my prayer. I have learned from my dream, which was so clear and the message was so easy to get, that to be present to the gifts given me is to ask myself, "What I am reacting to? What is it that I will not let 'be'?" And then I asked my dream self, "what was I really trying to say?" The answer was not to ask "Are you feeling stress?", but rather to ask, "How can I be of service to you?" Because, if I really want to be a stream that cuts deep in this world, I need to let my discomfort be a clue to what I am really feeling, to serve my feelings not my judgments, to let them be and then be the river, and provide a surface that is deep enough and strong enough to carry any who need passage. I need to be authentic and sincerely "In SERVICE" of myself and others by letting them be who and where they are (who and where I am) in that moment, just as they are meant to be.

Cleopatra's Conundrum: Scarab Amethyst Necklace

Cleopatra's Conundrum: Scarab Amethyst Necklace

Well, I was almost done with my most recent necklace and then it started developing holes! So, here is a picture of a work in re-progress. I hate making something more than once, but I've changed and maybe now I can more easily see redoing this piece as an opportunity to make it even better. So, I thought I'd show you before I took it all apart.

 The part I've already begun taking apart was where I began. Yes, it's tedious to take apart, but there is $60.00 worth of beads in it! I began with 3 pound Fire Line thread and it quickly developed holes, so I bought some 8 pound. I thought that would be enough to make it last forever, without holes developing. Wrong! So my friend and fellow artist Sue Horine suggested I reach out to Suzanne Golden. What an amazing woman and artist!

Suzanne is as colorful as her pieces, and as generous with her knowledge. When Sue described Suzanne as a mature woman with bright red hair, crazy cool fashion sense (especially her shoes), and a super talented bead weaver, I immediately thought of Betsy Johnson. I know they must be best buds!

Photo: Idiosyncratic Fashionistas

That's Suzanne on the far right. Aren't you immediately in love?!

Here's a sample of her work, and just one doesn't do her portfolio justice! If you want to see more of Suzanne's work, check it out here. I contacted her with my problem on Face book, and she immediately replied with great, new tips for me!






While I'm waiting for my new supplies, I'm planning my next project. In my last post I showed you some of the new beads I received. I can't get the scarabs and amethyst off my mind! My process doesn't usually involve a "plan", and any drawing I might do is on the back of an envelope or napkin. Well, I've changed, I tell ya! I'm so excited about this necklace. It will be in a collar style that is traditional to Egyptian fashion, other than that the concept is all mine inspired by symbols, such as the Egyptian Lily. The lily will be the hardest part of the design because it will require each ring to be hand wrapped with fine copper wire, and I've never painted with lines of beads before! I also still need to decide if I should add the agate fans to the bottom, or some turquoise drops or briolettes, or both. What do you think?

 

Yeah! New Beads listed!

If you want more information you can go to my shop here. Keep your eyes open because I have a few more listings coming up AND a new posting format including "Tubes n' Tutes Tuesday" "WeDesire Wednesday" and "Free Bead Friday"!

Watching the Pot Boil

latcrossword.blogspot.com

As many bloggers know, as they watch to see if their subscriber numbers have increased (like a watched pot of water...will it boil?!), It's so nice, when someone acknowledges my presence, as happened today. I received such a nice compliment on yesterday's post, how the person identified so deeply with what I had written, thanking me for the palpable experience. I had to go back and read again, because I'd forgotten what I had written (or was I just so in shock at being noticed and so affective?! Affect v. Effect = emotion v. consequence).

EffYeahNerdFighters.com

If I can't remember what I wrote, why did I write it? Why do any of us publish what we write? I want to be noticed. But I didn't remember what I'd written, even though I was successful in getting noticed; does WHAT I write really matter? I think it does, because I'm motivated to write by moments I find very poignant; they seem so important to me at that time, that I must share them. But is it the words that I must share, or is it the feeling they give me, or is it amazement, or is it self-importance begging for attaboys? Or maybe, I just write them to avoid feeling them, the words to be stored perhaps to be read another day, digested and vomited another time, or not. Or maybe I'm questioning all these feelings to avoid the confirmation that my words and thoughts ARE important, they ARE read, they DO have an effect on others. Perhaps my questioning is all a way for me to avoid ....my....self....

Anatomy of a Tear, Mona Rae Baroody

As I read yesterday's post again, I was stopped by these words "I want to feel safe, I want to feel love, I want to feel worth, I want to be vulnerable to feel need and reliance. I want to feel connected and related. I want to feel comfortable with receiving; I want to feel grateful. I want to feel pride without vanity. I want to feel like I am me, openly. I want to feel accepted."

TheHeartAttackSymptoms.org

My heart squeezed so tight, my sinuses clamped, my eyes hot and swelling, I slam one hand over my chest and the other over my mouth, as I struggle to breathe without crying, or continue living without breathing. Why do I want what I want? Why do I say "I want"? When I get it, why does my heart hurt soooooooo much? Perhaps if I continue to ask "why" I can continue to avoid ...my .....self

Today I felt love. Today I felt important. Today I felt connected. At this moment of outpouring I feel vulnerable, yet I also feel COMPLETELY safe. I have received, and survived it today. I am grateful for the connection of another, I am proud to give what they received, I am accepted as not so different after all. All that feels good, but what is it that causes this pain; could it be that I'm afraid of being what I already am? Could it be that I continue to reject exactly what I asked for when it is so freely, loving, and generously given? Is it that I STILL don't think I'm worthy of it? Is it humility?

ExpressNightOut.com

 What will it take to love my self? What will happen that motivates me rejoice in my greatness? I am SO powerful...it scares me.

 "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you." Maya Angelou

Accentuate the Positive

Just need to write about my adventure in #DesireMap. Woke at 3:33 am (what a number huh?!). Layed (is that the right spelling for the meaning?!) in bed, mind occupied on the past (negative memories) for an hour. Decided to have breakfast and engage in reading more of Danielle LaPorte's Desire Map.

Being aware is exhausting some times. I'm aware of all that I need to do today. I'm aware of all that I want to do today. There is nothing that I DON'T want to do, but it seems there's not enough day to do it all, AND considering I was up at such an early hour, there won't be enough energy to do it all. Sigh.

I'm aware that reading Desire Map is exciting me, driving me, inspiring me. I'm aware that while I want to swallow it whole, I NEED to slow down and digest. It isn't that I fear choking, but rather I desire to be nourished and grow. And just as those words are "drying" I get it....I get IT. Yeah me!

I was arguing with myself about taking the time to write, and now I'm so glad I did. This is an example of how doing what makes me feel good, rather making my goals according to my desires, gives positive results. And I also recognize, in this moment, that happened very, very, VERY quickly, with MINIMAL EFFORT....boy, that's just the way I like my equation for "Effort".

Photo Courtesy of Kali Segrino.blogspot.com

Glad I'm taking it slowly because I also discovered what my body does when a feeling is "real". It happened when I read "Kali Mama Goddess". It's the word "Kali" that literally squeezed my heart, put pressure on my sinuses, and caused tears to well; I felt recognition. I have a tapestry hanging on my studio wall of Kali. The colors are beautiful and brilliant and audacious, as is the subject.




On a final note, one of the chapters is titled "Accentuate the Positive." Here's what my memory immediately recalled.

Feeeeelings, Wooooah Feeeeeelings (Sing it y'all!)

I have been feeling static, stuck, unambitious, and unsuccessful. I have been feeling lost. I have been feeling as if I have no feelings…apathetic.

I’ve always been a huge fan of Danielle LaPorte and her “White, Hot Truth”. She’s the author of Firestarter Sessions, but I have not taken part in that program. Danielle’s words have always resonated with me. Yesterday she launched a new program called Desire Map; it is my mom’s Christmas present to me ($170 in 3 payments, delivered today both digitally and tangibly), and will become my present to my son on his 16^th birthday.

Danielle says, “We have the procedures of achievement upside down. We go after the stuff we want to have, get, accomplish, and experience outside of ourselves. And we hope, yearn, pray that we’ll be fulfilled when we get there. It’s backwards. It’s outside in. And it’s running us in circles.

What if, first, we got clear on how we actually wanted to feel in our life, and then we laid out our intentions? What if your most desired feelings consciously informed how you plan your day, your year, your career, your holidays — your life?”

I think she’s on to something here! My feelings are all wrapped around not achieving, to my satisfaction. Maybe my feelings are the way they are because I’m not setting my satisfaction as a goal; maybe its because I don’t know what will satisfy me. I have been stuck most painfully in the knowledge that I don’t know what I want.

Danielle’s program will coach me through a process that helps me get clear on how I want to feel in my life, and set my goals according to my “core desires.” For me, this is an “ah ha!” realization: of course this is the way it should be! 

I’ll try to take you with me through my self realizations. In the mean time, I want to share a couple video’s with you. If you want to know more about the program, please click here. 

(1:02) Desire More : Danielle LaPorte : Video Poem from Danielle LaPorte on Vimeo.

This  video is about an hour long and is a workshop video of Goals With Soul. It gives a real feel for the program purpose. If you want to know more about the program, please click here.

25% off Everything!

Boy, am I beat; what a great Thanksgiving. 





I've listed rings and a bracelet and a bead today. I'm also offering 25% off EVERYTHING in my ETSY shop; use coupon code "THANKSGIVING" at checkout. The sale ends at midnight (PST) on Sunday, 11/25/12.

Cocoa Mum

I made a complete Thanksgiving dinner in about 4 hours, kept it warm while we went to volunteer at the community dinner at Ebbetts Pass Moose Lodge, where we met old friends, and made new friends. What a surprising day to see people I haven't seen in forever like Kristy Moore, Dee Mandell, and Linda and Kelly Wright!

Then we came home to a smoked turkey, fresh green bean casserole, cornbread and kale stuffing, Rot Khol (German style red cabbage), mashed potatoes, roast turkey gravy, cranberry salad (Mom's recipe), and ginger snap pumpkin pie with candied pumpkin seed topping, all made from scratch!! In FOUR HOURS!!! Go Mona, Go Mona, Go Mona! Most of the recipes were successful, and you can find them on my Pinterest Board "Favorite Recipes I've Tried".

And now the kitchen is clean, and I've collapsed on the couch. Many thoughts of many friends and family over these last few days have warmed my heart, and given me hope for a brighter future and much love for all! Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas and Hanukkah on the way, remember to buy local and buy handmade! Much love!

 

Interesting and Creative Pics on FB

 

Mona, Mona, How Does Your Garden Grow

Well the first week of September has come and gone. Kids are back in school, I'm back to work,  and soon it will be frosty. It is hard to believe this gorgeous weather will end soon. Well, it won't "end" but will  transform to crisp, frosty, and snowy, another beautiful weather here in Arnold.

Click the Pic to see all  my garden pictures!

It is also hard to believe that my garden is finally producing fruit! I hope the rest of it gets a chance to mature before the first frost. I have a gorgeous zucchini that I JUST found, but it's already 3+ inches  long; lots more new ones showing too.  I wonder if the female flower at it's end is telling me to pick the fruit; I know that if you pick the bloom the fruit stops growing...does it matter if the bloom is dried up? I have two baby tomatoes at the site of my first blossoms. Green beans aren't done, but I only have a few flowers. Next year I'll have to plant at least 3 times the amount and stagger plantings so I can have larger and longer harvests. Cucumbers are amazing looking! Big ones are growing in the pot near the roots, the flowers are still coming, and the longest vine must be 4 feet! I FINALLY have peppers, well the buds at least. I checked to see if  the carrots are ready to harvest but the shoulders are still deep under the surface. I've been using the basil a lot; the more I use the more the plants produce.

I emailed my subscribers a new update on my web site. The update includes beads that have not been listed yet; they are exclusively for sale to my list subscribers, and they make an  offer instead of me setting prices. If you want in on that deal, you need to subscribe to my web site by clicking here. You also will get 15% off of your next purchase and the coupon doesn't expire!

Murder at Half Passed Midnight

Halloween will soon be here. To get me motivated, my dreams gave me the worst nightmare I've ever had! I retell the story on my website. Click the Pic to read it.






 I also tried out some of my hardware store findings to make a bracelet. What do you think  of it?  It's kind of wide and top heavy, but I love the beads, the style and the colors.

 Lampworker Extraordinaire, Jennifer Geldard,  introduced me to a  new blogger and she's Hilarious!! Check out Pintester: (Effing up Pins so You Don't Have To!)  here! 

My Favorite Pins

Speaking of Pinterest, I love  it! My home page looks like a Pinterest page! Here is a collection of my favorite pins this week. Click the Pic above to see them!

Besides watching both political conventions, I did put up new listings of beads and Jewelry this week. I made lots of posts to my web site.

I am thinking about making an official FaceBook page, but I'd like your opinion. Please take my poll and leave an opinion by clicking here.

God Bless America - And you too!

I just added a new post to my new website, MonaRAEbeads.com. I watched a great movie this morning called God Bless America (2011, Goldthwait); read my review and commentary. Check out my new website, sign up for updates and get a coupon for 15% off your next purchase!

Courtesy of Magnetreleasing.com

So, I have been working on a new website! I was inspired by the lack of employment, abundance of time, lack of funds, and LKRsocialmedia's $1 offer. I have subscribed to Laura Roeder's The Dash newsletter for a while and took advantage of her offer for a month of social media tools. While on her site, I was inspired to start a new web site and use Word Press to create it. Word Press is a great software program, but has a high learning curve. I am enjoying it's "language", and will keep learning about it, and will keep applying the principles I learned from LKR as I continue to develop my website (which looks like a Pinterest page!!!)

My garden is going strong. I have new pics to share with you! My green beans are big (wonder when I should pick them). I've pulled peas for next crop's seed. I'm starting to see  fruit on the watermelon and squash plants. I've got TONS of cucumbers blooming (I'm sure I planted squash but got cucumbers instead!?)  My bush cherry tomato has its first flower. My cilantro has bloomed so it is now  Coriander and has seed pods that I'll use for the next planting. My herbs are starting to produce a usable amount; yesterday's spaghetti sauce was seasoned only with oregano, basil, and parsley from my garden!

See all my garden pictures on my FaceBook

If you are a Facebook Friend or live in the Mother Lode, you know we've had a fire very close to home. It is now around 75% contained. Here's my favorite picture of the firefighting efforts.

DC10 Fighting Ramsey Fire, Calaveras County (ThePineTree.net)

 

Speaking of wildfire, I will be doing some lot cleanup around my own house this morning and then I think I'll make some beads! I'll be pretty busy next week, and through September; I have a temp substitute position for 3 to 4 days a week! It pays to have faith!!! Isaac is ready for school, thanks to Grandma Uta! Isaac LOVES all the clothes "They are perfect!"

How to Make Money Flow

First, a picture of my beads last week. Only three, but one of them broke; I like the yellow one with purple flowers. The gray/black/coral combo didn't turn out quite the way I wanted; the dark is lighter than I imagined.

Courtesy of Market Playground

In my last blog post, How to Get What You Need, I had a discussion about money (or the lack thereof), and received a wonderful comment from RC about how money flows; you MUST read it if you are having trouble with the direction of money in your own life.

Money is like a river, and it flows; when you hold on to money, it cannot move. We've all heard the phrase, "You can't take it with you", as well as the phrase, "You have to spend money to make money." Of the latter, I've always thought you have to spend money as an investment to get a return in the same class as the investment. For example, I spent money to start my website again and I'm hoping the flow will return in the sale of beads on the web site. Well, it doesn't have to be a specifically directed release, it just has to be a release. As long as you are holding tight to your money, you are stopping the flow, you are stopping it's journey away from, AND BACK AGAIN to you. 

Courtesy of Grieving.Org

It is about faith. That post also discussed having what you need versus what you want. I've been in this financial situation before, but then it didn't worry me as much; I had faith that God would provide what I needed, exactly when I needed it. Sometimes fear gets in the way of faith. So, I stopped being in fear and treated myself to a beer at the Moose Lodge, and had an awesome time on $5.00!

I also discussed giving as a way of receiving, and the realization that people need me to be "Mona" and that is how I give, and that isolating myself was keeping me from giving to, and receiving from, others. So on Saturday I visited friends, had a wonderful dinner, and wonderful fun.

God has her way of waking us up and making us see. It turns out that one sentence was repeated each night: "I was beginning to get really worried about you." It was time for all the elements to come back together. I'm grateful for every day, every one in it, and every moment as it is. My heart is open again.

In the bead world, The International Society of Glass Beadmakers (ISGB) is looking for instructors and talented presenters at the Gathering event in 2013. The ISGB is THE authority for glass artists, and to be a presenter or instructor you have to be a MAJOR artist, at least that is what I always felt. The best of the best teach and present here. People go to the Annual Gathering from far away, points international, to taste from the golden cup of glass perfection and innovation. I wonder if I could ever be that good!? If I made beads every day I might be that good;  if I worked on my brand every day I could be that desirable.

This year’s Gathering is in Washington, and begins this week! I would love to take classes if I were there. Classes are available in so many artistic medium from felt, to metal, to glass, and combinations of some of them too. 

Two of the mini classes (offered at night) that I would attend:

Cynthia Toops is doing a class on polymer clay combined with glass.

 

Heather Trimlett is teaching a two day class on making perfectly round beads and even twisty cane. I love Heather’s work! (Image courtesy of Jelveh Designs)

I don’t know how I would choose a regular class; the choices are incredible! 

Judy Carlson is teaching a fish making class

One of my faves, Marcy Lamberson, is teaching. She makes the most whimsical beads.

Kristina Logan is teaching. She’s the queen of dot placement, control, and dragging glass!

Margaret Zinzer is teaching. She’s the queen of insect inspirations!

One of the non-torch classes I would take is a photography class with Doug Baldwin. The beads in this picture are made with dichroic and metallic glass. These glass types shift color and luster depending on light and are very very difficult to capture on film! Doug Baldwin knows how to do it!

Please feel free to pin my blog to your Boards, 

that way you can share all the beautiful beads at once!

How to Get What You Need

Today I realized why I’ve been in such a funk. And by funk, I mean way down deep sad and tired of this life. I have been isolating myself from the world, from real people. 

I’ve been staying home because I cannot afford to go out. I cannot afford the gas, I cannot afford $5 to play pool, and I’m constantly worried about money. I feel like I’ve forgotten how to smile and I just don’t want to subject anyone to that.

Courtesy of LoveScott

Today’s meditation, and yesterday’s visit with my friend Nancy were very enlightening to me. Today’s meditation focuses on a giving heart and emphasizes that you almost never give of your heart without receiving something back; when you are feeling a lack, just give and that feeling will be resolved. I am a giver of my heart, and my heart relies on being around people, giving my energy, sharing, and learning. I need to go back to having faith that what I need will happen for me.

Courtesy of Amber Avines

I’ve been feeling in limbo and disappointed that I’m not getting what I want, and not even sure of what I want. Yesterday I realized that maybe what I want is not what I need. Maybe I don’t need to conform to the expectations of others; maybe I don’t need a traditional job. Maybe what I need is to appreciate myself for someone who can do anything and when I do things I love doing I am always successful. Maybe I need to remember that great reward does not come without great risk.

Courtesy of Design Seeds

Today I made beads, and for the first time in a long time, I loved doing it. I followed my heart and allowed no restrictions. I made a coral black and gray bead, like the dress I mentioned in an earlier post. I made a bead with lots of texture and explored a new shape. I made a bead that was inspired by Design Seeds. And I made a bead totally from my own imagination and that one is going to be soooooooo beautiful! I’m so excited to see them come out of the kiln tomorrow!

Courtesy of WakeupCloud

So, with my new found energy for beads, and self, I’m going to continue with my journey toward social media marketing both in my bead business and in my professional life. I am not sure what shape it will take, but I will follow my instincts and unique inspirations and Just. Do. It!

I am Lakshmi, Growing from the Lotus in the Desert

Courtesy of The Village Family Services

Today was a ritual of letting go of the things that keep me from loving. It was very difficult. I have a hard time letting go. On a simple level it is because it means I've done something wrong. In reality it means that someone doesn't want me. I can't think of incidents that I need to let go; I always think of people I need to let go. I feel wrong for severing from them and I have a difficult time getting perspective on "killing off" people.

Courtesy of GodHungry: When Adults Refuse to Grow Up

I did however realize that I needed to forgive someone for not being a better person, and more than that, for knowing better but not wanting to do better. And I think that is my ultimate beef with everyone that lets me down; they know better but choose to stay where they are or go deeper into where they were. They want some comfortable familiarity where they don't have to think, don't have to decide, don't have to change, don't have to fear, don't have to question. I totally understand that because it is that comfort I have in the people who have hurt me the most.

Courtesy of Trek Earth

The people who have hurt me the most do so by choosing comfort instead of growth, and they hurt me because they leave me alone. Alone to journey, alone to grow, alone to fear the changes, alone to be brave, alone to have the courage. I guess life was not to be that easy for me this time around. Is my lesson in life to be alone? Is my lesson in life to see that I am not alone? Oh, if the latter is true, I am most certainly failing. Because I am alone in body, perhaps in spirit with the exception of God, My Words, Buddha. Perhaps it is a choice to be alone, rather than a circumstance put upon me. After all, isn't "alone" just a meaning I am giving?  I am growing, I am moving, I am waiting, I am wandering, I am flying, I am, So Hum.

Courtesy of LifeArte

Today I want to make a bead with the colors coral gray, and black. I saw a color block dress on a model in a yahoo advertisement. I can't find the picture now, darn it!

Courtesy of VictoriaBC Wedding Tips

It is supposed to be very hot today and tomorrow. I need to water my plants and maybe take pictures of new growth in the garden. Gonna make meatloaf for dinner and a potato salad. Need to get the potato salad done early. The infection in my lip seems better this morning; I'll just keep treating it and not go to the doctor. Need to think of a dessert to make, but do it early before the heat. Still trying to deal with cravings for nicotine.

Homework to do on the website, social media, and bead biz.